Life in Bangladesh has been a significant adjustment, a shock if you will to my diet system. Things like Bangla Cha (tea with sweetened condensed milk), biscuits (cookies), rice, nan (flat bread), potatoes, pumpkin, and other snack foods made with flour and potatoes have become common place and a way of life. As I have previously mentioned, it is important in this culture to thankfully eat what the host has served (within reason) and with discretion. I have tried to do that. Finding a new normal for myself has proven to be difficult, but certainly not impossible.
There are a few things I have learned about myself and they are as follows:
1. Rice and chicken curry has become my favorite meal. Even if I were in Wakarusa, Indiana today and I had my choice of all the places I could eat within 1/2 hour, I would still choose curry!
2. I love curry, but buyer beware! I greatly enjoy the taste of chicken (Morgir Mangsho, in Bangla) curry with rice (bhat), vegetables (shobji) and potatoes (alu) but along with that comes a price in calories. I cannot get enough of this great food and that has always been a costly problem for me.
3. Fruit has come alive! After a year with very little fruit, I have found myself to be a fruit lover. In Bangladesh, we have bananas (cola), apples (appel), oranges (comala), watermelon, pomegranate and apples readily available. We will also have fresh mangos, lichees and pineapples coming into season. Fruit is one of the major food groups and when I got here I went crazy on that group. Fruit is good for you, but one banana is 5 times the carbs that I used to take in for an entire day.
With this new knowledge I have of myself, I have done the following:
1. Eat the foods that I love (and even some that I don't) but eat them in moderation. I have gone to taking a very small serving of rice if eating at home. If that does not quench my appetite, I will have a very very small second serving.
2. When I am in a Bengali person's home I ask them for a reduced portion. I eat what they give me (which is far more than I eat at home), but when I am finished, I refuse seconds. On the days that this happens, I am also very careful about what I eat for other meals.
3. I have integrated regular exeercise in my daily routine for the first time in my life. Three weeks ago, I downloaded the Get Running (Couch to 5k) application. I have never been drawn to running, but I have to say that it is not as bad as I have always made it in my mind.
4. Pray harder than ever! This one is by far the most important of any of the activities. I have found myself praying now more than ever that God would continue to change my heart and draw me nearer to him, in this category of my life especially. I confess to Him when I take more cookies or rice than I should. I ask Him to let me burn more calories than I consume on a daily basis. I ask Him to reveal more to me about my gluttony so I can better fight against it. I ask him to help me battle against temptations and not succumb to them. More than once, I have found myself praying Psalm 51:10 "Create in me a clean heart, O God; and renew a right spirit within me.
Some days, when I weigh myself, I get frustrated that I am not losing weight as quickly as I would like to. I must keep in mind though, that I am still losing weight after a dramatic life change. On those days, it is important to choose joy and press on!
Monday, April 2, 2012
Wednesday, February 8, 2012
Back on Track (264.5 pounds)
It has been just a week shy of two full months since I have posted to my blog. Wow, has a lot happened in the last two months. As most (if not all) of you know, my family has moved to be missionaries in Bangladesh. We arrived at our new home in Malumghat, Bangladesh on 1/14/12 and we are thrilled to be here.
In my life, few temptations have beset me the way gluttony has. To be quite transparent, I arrived in Bangladesh with more than just the contents of my totes containing my personal belongings for living for the next two years. In addition to my families personal belongings, I also carried with me other heavy baggage; the baggage of fear, doubt and dissapointment. As I have detailed in this blog, God has done a miraculous work in my body, but that was in the US where I could have a strictly regimented low calorie and ultra low carbohydrate diet. Now I was moving my family to Bangladesh where they drink tea (with sweatened condensed milk) at least twice every day and the main staple in the vast majority of meals is rice. In my heart and in my mind I knew that I could not be offensive to the people of Bangladesh. They are a very hospitible people and I many relationships would be built and fortified around a cup of tea. The fear of how my body would react towards the re-introduction of carbs in my diet crept in. Next, I started to doubt that I could keep the weight off that God so graciously helped me to lose. Next, I progressed to the advance feeling of dissapointment that only comes with being defeated. What is it that I could do? My feelings were that I was in a going into a place where I was setting myself up to thrive in what I have been called to do in life, but to fail (miserably) in my continued goals towards losing weight.
For weeks leading up to leaving and in the weeks since I have been in my new home, I have done much introspection. I have come up with a few thoughts and they are:
1. My feelings are not what matters sometimes, but rather the facts are what matters. The facts are that just because the low carb diet is the only diet I have succeeded on, that does not mean that it is the only diet I can succeed on. Another fact is that I can be confident in "...he which hath begun a good work in you will perform it until the day of Jesus Christ." God is not done working with my heart and with my weight just because I reached a few goals.
2. I have a problem (many problems actually.) I love to eat, and I am not talking about eating a little... I love to eat a lot of food. That is a big deal, because I didn't think I would really care for the food here that much, but boy was I wrong, the food here is great! My family eats rice and curry for lunch every day and it is the highlight food wise of each day for me.
3. I have a fair amount of resolve. While I love to eat a lot, I also know that eating a lot is no longer who I am. Yes, there are times that I have "fallen off the wagon" since I have been there and eaten 4 chocolate chip cookies in one setting (OK, it was 5, but who was counting? I had't had any in a year, so that is only .1 cookies per week over the last year...) While I laugh a bit about it now IT IS NOT OK! One or two cookies may be OK on occasion, but eating 5 cookies is slipping in to that habit that is gluttony. I am resolved not to give in. This is a minute by minute test for me, sometimes even a second by second test. I will not always win, but I am resolved to not go back to that evil, yet so familiar place.
So with those things said (and other things left unsaid) I have had very limited success at weight loss since arriving in Bangladesh. I weighed in the day that I arrived and I was 260.0 pounds. I then weighed in this morning prior to breakfast and I was 264.5 pounds. I have weighed in as high as 266.0 pounds since I have been here. My body is not operating as lean as it once was, but over the coming weeks I will be able to figure the new normal and then implement exercise to comeserate for the increase in intake and prayerfully, I beleive I will get right back on track.
In my life, few temptations have beset me the way gluttony has. To be quite transparent, I arrived in Bangladesh with more than just the contents of my totes containing my personal belongings for living for the next two years. In addition to my families personal belongings, I also carried with me other heavy baggage; the baggage of fear, doubt and dissapointment. As I have detailed in this blog, God has done a miraculous work in my body, but that was in the US where I could have a strictly regimented low calorie and ultra low carbohydrate diet. Now I was moving my family to Bangladesh where they drink tea (with sweatened condensed milk) at least twice every day and the main staple in the vast majority of meals is rice. In my heart and in my mind I knew that I could not be offensive to the people of Bangladesh. They are a very hospitible people and I many relationships would be built and fortified around a cup of tea. The fear of how my body would react towards the re-introduction of carbs in my diet crept in. Next, I started to doubt that I could keep the weight off that God so graciously helped me to lose. Next, I progressed to the advance feeling of dissapointment that only comes with being defeated. What is it that I could do? My feelings were that I was in a going into a place where I was setting myself up to thrive in what I have been called to do in life, but to fail (miserably) in my continued goals towards losing weight.
For weeks leading up to leaving and in the weeks since I have been in my new home, I have done much introspection. I have come up with a few thoughts and they are:
1. My feelings are not what matters sometimes, but rather the facts are what matters. The facts are that just because the low carb diet is the only diet I have succeeded on, that does not mean that it is the only diet I can succeed on. Another fact is that I can be confident in "...he which hath begun a good work in you will perform it until the day of Jesus Christ." God is not done working with my heart and with my weight just because I reached a few goals.
2. I have a problem (many problems actually.) I love to eat, and I am not talking about eating a little... I love to eat a lot of food. That is a big deal, because I didn't think I would really care for the food here that much, but boy was I wrong, the food here is great! My family eats rice and curry for lunch every day and it is the highlight food wise of each day for me.
3. I have a fair amount of resolve. While I love to eat a lot, I also know that eating a lot is no longer who I am. Yes, there are times that I have "fallen off the wagon" since I have been there and eaten 4 chocolate chip cookies in one setting (OK, it was 5, but who was counting? I had't had any in a year, so that is only .1 cookies per week over the last year...) While I laugh a bit about it now IT IS NOT OK! One or two cookies may be OK on occasion, but eating 5 cookies is slipping in to that habit that is gluttony. I am resolved not to give in. This is a minute by minute test for me, sometimes even a second by second test. I will not always win, but I am resolved to not go back to that evil, yet so familiar place.
So with those things said (and other things left unsaid) I have had very limited success at weight loss since arriving in Bangladesh. I weighed in the day that I arrived and I was 260.0 pounds. I then weighed in this morning prior to breakfast and I was 264.5 pounds. I have weighed in as high as 266.0 pounds since I have been here. My body is not operating as lean as it once was, but over the coming weeks I will be able to figure the new normal and then implement exercise to comeserate for the increase in intake and prayerfully, I beleive I will get right back on track.
Wednesday, December 14, 2011
There were several catalysts for me losing weight (267.4 pounds)
Last night, Ruth and I watched the season finale for The Biggest Loser. It was very sobering to watch that show knowing what God has done in my own body. There were a lot of people on that show that have lost less than me, and some who have lost more than me. It was interesting to hear what motivated these people to lose weight. Some of the people lost weight for love, some for family, some for money and yet others were driven to lose weight by the iron will of their trainer. I got to thinking, what drove me to lose weight? I would submit to you that there were several catalysts for me losing weight and some of them were:
1. In being morbidly obese, I was being blatantly defiant to God. I was in essence telling God that my desires were more important to me than being in a right relationship with him.
2. Being morbidly obese was prohibiting me from being where I am supposed to be. God has called my family to be missionaries in Bangladesh. If I would have gone to Bangladesh at 435 pounds, I would not be nearly as effective in my ministry as I will be able to be at a normal weight.
3. My love for my family. There is nothing on earth I love more than Ruth, Sarah and Alexis. I want to do my best to grow old with my wife and be around as my children have children of their own.
4. Encouragement from friends and family.
So, in the spirit of The Biggest Loser finale, I will give you my statistics to date.
Weight
1/31/2011 435.0 pounds
12/12/2011 267.4 pounds
Body Mass Index
1/31/2011 59.0%
12/12/2011 36.3%
Total percent of body weight loss = 38.5%
1. In being morbidly obese, I was being blatantly defiant to God. I was in essence telling God that my desires were more important to me than being in a right relationship with him.
2. Being morbidly obese was prohibiting me from being where I am supposed to be. God has called my family to be missionaries in Bangladesh. If I would have gone to Bangladesh at 435 pounds, I would not be nearly as effective in my ministry as I will be able to be at a normal weight.
3. My love for my family. There is nothing on earth I love more than Ruth, Sarah and Alexis. I want to do my best to grow old with my wife and be around as my children have children of their own.
4. Encouragement from friends and family.
So, in the spirit of The Biggest Loser finale, I will give you my statistics to date.
Weight
1/31/2011 435.0 pounds
12/12/2011 267.4 pounds
Body Mass Index
1/31/2011 59.0%
12/12/2011 36.3%
Total percent of body weight loss = 38.5%
Monday, December 5, 2011
there is a God, and I am not Him. (268.8 pounds)
In the movie Rudy, the character that played Notre Dame President Father John J. Cavanaugh said "...in 35 years of religious study, I have only come up with two hard incontrovertible facts: there is a God, and I'm not Him." Today, I am so very glad that this statement is true. As many of you may recall, I was very distraught last week when I learned that the people that were going to rent my house fell through. I have come to realize, however, that God's plans are better than my own. There was a renter for my house that was a good qualified tenant, but they were not the right tenants for my home. I am so happy to tell you that God brought another family to us who are interested in our home. That is great news, but it gets even better! God has brought us a family that not only really likes our home, but get this: they want to rent it for 2 years!!! I will never get tired of witnessing God's mighty acts in answering prayer!
Monday, November 28, 2011
Effectively managing stress can be a big challenge to weight loss. (270.0 pounds)
Effectively managing stress can be a big challenge to weight loss. Right now in my life, stress is mounting. Ruth, the girls and I are seeking God and expect our departure day for Bangladesh to be in 36 days. There are many stressful things to navigate through between now and then. The biggest stress for me though is regarding my house. We have decided to rent our house out for the first two years as missionaries. After two years, we will come home and will most likely list our home for sale and auction off our belongings. Just over a week ago a gentleman heard that our home was available for rent through a dear friend of mine and contacted us. This gentleman was moving to my area from Chicago for work and after seeing our home, he decided to rent it! What a stress relief this was and certainly something to be very thankful for!
Today though, stress reared its ugly head in a big way in my life when this gentleman called and informed me that he had decided not to rent my home and decided to rent another home. After a short conversation I wished him the absolute best and hung up the phone feeling like I had just been socked in the (now smaller) gut. Other than crying, the first thing that I wanted to do after hearing this news was to eat a lot of candy bars. I did do one of those two activities, but I am proud to say that it was not eating the candy bars!
My belief that God already has a renter picked out for my house has not changed. Yes, I submit to you that the person I thought was going to be my renter is indeed not that person, but they were obviously not the right person either. In fact, I am glad that they decided never to move in rather than moving out after not paying any payments months after moving in with my family being in Bangladesh all the while.
When I become burdened by stress, my initial desire is to fall back to the trusty comfort of food when really I need to instead rest in Christ. Today I am weary, and rather than eating I need rest.
Matthew 11:28-30 Come unto me, all ye that labour and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you; for I am meek and lowly in heart: and ye shall find rest unto your souls. For my yoke is easy, and my burden is light.
Today though, stress reared its ugly head in a big way in my life when this gentleman called and informed me that he had decided not to rent my home and decided to rent another home. After a short conversation I wished him the absolute best and hung up the phone feeling like I had just been socked in the (now smaller) gut. Other than crying, the first thing that I wanted to do after hearing this news was to eat a lot of candy bars. I did do one of those two activities, but I am proud to say that it was not eating the candy bars!
My belief that God already has a renter picked out for my house has not changed. Yes, I submit to you that the person I thought was going to be my renter is indeed not that person, but they were obviously not the right person either. In fact, I am glad that they decided never to move in rather than moving out after not paying any payments months after moving in with my family being in Bangladesh all the while.
When I become burdened by stress, my initial desire is to fall back to the trusty comfort of food when really I need to instead rest in Christ. Today I am weary, and rather than eating I need rest.
Matthew 11:28-30 Come unto me, all ye that labour and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you; for I am meek and lowly in heart: and ye shall find rest unto your souls. For my yoke is easy, and my burden is light.
Thursday, November 24, 2011
I praise God that He has chosen such a flawed man like me to help others. (270.6 pounds)
A few week ends ago our family had the great opportunity to share our life's story and our passion for Bangladesh with Ruth's parents church in Plymouth, Indiana. After speaking in Sunday School, I was approached by a gentleman who was asking me about my weight loss. He told me that it was of particular interest to him because he had a grandson who was in need of losing a lot of weight. I asked this gentleman if he would ask his grandson if I could take him to dinner some night and he told me he would ask him and let me know. We exchanged contact information and went on our respective ways. I was pleasantly surprised the next week when the grandfather did, in fact, contact me and I scheduled dinner with the grandson for the following Thursday night.
Fast forward a couple of weeks and the grandson now has a name (Aaron) and we have had dinner together a couple of times with the most recent time being tonight. Aaron is 18 years old, 6'4" and 425 pounds. Anyone seeing Aaron would see him as a big dude. Aaron reminds me a lot of myself. Aaron really enjoys a lot of the same things I enjoy and I know the hurts he feels far to well. I am not talking about the pain that being 400+lbs. physically inflicts on your body. Rather, I am speaking for the far more debilitating emotional pain that being morbidly obese causes.
There is no doubt in my mind that God has done and continues to do a miracle in my body. Because I have experienced this, I have the rare ability to speak with conviction to Aaron and any of the other over 30% of Americans who are obese. I do not have medical expertise to offer Aaron nor can I serve as a master dietitian for him. All I can offer him is hope. It is my desire in the coming weeks to continue to share with Aaron that God is willing and able to do an amazing work in his life.
Friends, please pray for Aaron. Please pray first that Aaron will encounter God through the saving grace of His son Jesus Christ. Also, please pray that Aaron will be willing and obedient to do what is good and right with regards to his weight.
To have gone through all of the things that I have in the last year'ish has been incredibly humbling. Moreover, to be used of the Lord to help others is earth shaking to me. I praise God that He has chosen to use such a flawed man like me to help others!
Fast forward a couple of weeks and the grandson now has a name (Aaron) and we have had dinner together a couple of times with the most recent time being tonight. Aaron is 18 years old, 6'4" and 425 pounds. Anyone seeing Aaron would see him as a big dude. Aaron reminds me a lot of myself. Aaron really enjoys a lot of the same things I enjoy and I know the hurts he feels far to well. I am not talking about the pain that being 400+lbs. physically inflicts on your body. Rather, I am speaking for the far more debilitating emotional pain that being morbidly obese causes.
There is no doubt in my mind that God has done and continues to do a miracle in my body. Because I have experienced this, I have the rare ability to speak with conviction to Aaron and any of the other over 30% of Americans who are obese. I do not have medical expertise to offer Aaron nor can I serve as a master dietitian for him. All I can offer him is hope. It is my desire in the coming weeks to continue to share with Aaron that God is willing and able to do an amazing work in his life.
Friends, please pray for Aaron. Please pray first that Aaron will encounter God through the saving grace of His son Jesus Christ. Also, please pray that Aaron will be willing and obedient to do what is good and right with regards to his weight.
To have gone through all of the things that I have in the last year'ish has been incredibly humbling. Moreover, to be used of the Lord to help others is earth shaking to me. I praise God that He has chosen to use such a flawed man like me to help others!
Tuesday, November 8, 2011
Same (274.8 pounds)
For the first time since January 31, 2011 I weighed the same as last week. I am happy to not have increased in weight, but excited about a loss next week!
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